Monday, January 21, 2013

He doesn't exist

Blahblahblah, I haven't been on in a while. Shit happened and I'll tell you about the good stuff when I have a chance to calm down from what I discovered today.

Dr. Traner doesn't exist.

I realized that I had an appointment with him soon, but the only person who would have been able to take me then would be my sister, so she needed the address. It suddenly clicked in my head that I didn't know it myself and went to look it up.

I searched his name.

I searched the hospital.

I searched everything I could think of.


Confused, I decided to call them, but quickly realized I didn't know their number. I asked my mom and she gave it to me, but when I called I got the automated message of "the number you are trying to call is not operational".

I dropped the phone. I ran to my room. I dove in bed. I screamed and cried.

I have been going to a hospital that doesn't seem to exist, to visit a doctor who was supposed to be a pretty well-known psych. Yet, I can't find a fucking trace of him.

I'm still trying to calm down, but I can't figure out how.

If anyone can help me track him down and prove he's real, please do. I'm too scared to talk to my parents about it...

...Ohgod... They had been taking me... They knew about him, but if he doesn't exist and the hospital isn't listed anywhere... then...

Who was Dr. Traner, and how did my parents find out about him...

I'm gonna go to bed now and try to sleep... I feel as though my insides are about to explode...


  1. do you want me to butt in now or should i wait a bit for all i see is Him all over it.

  2. I think your familiar with the labyrinth. Are you not. It makes sense doesn't it.
    ~snøw crøss

    1. So what you're implying is that I'm in the labyrinth. Yeah, sure. That makes sense. /sarcasm

  3. Look its the only thing that makes any sense so far. Either that or your family do i put this gently...gone. You have 2 options. One is to start running again.
    Two is to find a way out if you are in the labyrinth.
    Oh an option 3. Try to forget about everything and ultimately die without a trace.
    ~snøw crøss

    1. You aren't exactly a beacon of joy and hope, are you? I know I was freaking out, but this is ridiculous. I am not so desperate for an answer that I'll stoop back into insanity to find one.

    2. im not saying you have to like the third option said you can try to forget about the whole thing register for another docter and put this whole thing behind you...but i hope you know this wont end he doesnt just forget about people.